Posts Tagged "sex"

Ok, honestly girls, how often have you been at a bar and heard this?  — >> “Hey Baby, how about we go back to your place and…cuddle.”

*Clears throat*

Excuse me but I was wondering….What is Polyamory? What is a Swinger?What’s a Kitten Pile? A Cuddle-In? What’s the difference between a four (or more)some and an orgy? Why are threesomes between two women and one man (FMF) “cooler” then two men sharing one woman(MFM) in between? My head’s spinning already. (Ok, and I’m a little turned on, sue me!)

Ashley Madison. Does the name sound familiar? Perhaps she’s a C-List starlet you might’ve seen on a really bad late night  movie fest. Perhaps she’s one of your favorite AVN award nominations. But what the name is actually synonymous with these days is extra-marital affairs. And they’re not shy about their pride in being so. Officially launched in 2002 the Canadian based Ashley Madison is the premier site for cheating spouses.

Have you ever seen the show Manswers? Not sure I would recommend it per se, but I happened to catch a bit of it the other night and was slightly intrigued by the question “Who is the patron saint of Whores?”

Wow – did I just date myself with that song? Anyhoo…

News Flash!

• 11% of Americans don’t know you CAN get pregnant while having sex standing up
• 26% never discuss contraception with their partners
• 31% never discuss sexual health such as STIs with their partners

These figures were recently released based on a poll of 2,000 Americans between the ages of 16 and 50 according to this article.

No mention of who conducted the poll nor their methods was revealed, making the poll itself very very very suspect in my mind. (For all I know the author of the article pulled the numbers right out of his you-know-what.) But the validity of the survey isn’t really the interesting part…It’s the idea behind the questions that I’d like to focus on here.

No Sexy Talk with Your Sex Machine?

You’d think that if there was one person in this entire world who you could talk with about sex in an open and nonjudgmental way it would be your own lover. After all, you’re HAVING sex WITH them. At the very least, you’d probably want to talk about life-altering consequences such as…oh…Children and Incurable Diseases!

Breaking it down, I suppose you could avoid the STI conversation after you’ve been sleeping with just each other for a while, assuming no one is cheating, swinging, etc.

But what about in the beginning? Are you really going to have sex with someone without asking if they’ve been tested recently? (And if not, what makes them believe they are disease-free?)  It seems like an awfully big risk for 20 minutes of hot, heavy sticky fun.

But let’s assume you’re willing to take that chance JUST to avoid an emotionally embarrassing conversation…

Not even Contraception talk?! A basic – “Do you use condoms?” “Are you on the pill?” Really? What happens when you’ve both taken your clothes off and are ready to “connect”? Does he just assume she’s on birth control while she just prays she doesn’t get pregnant this time? Eeek!

How can either of you have ANY fun if all you’re doing is worrying about these things in the moment rather than taking care of the issues beforehand?

Even if you don’t care about your own personal safety or possible accidental procreation – at least care about the quality of your sex!

Talking about these “big, uncomfortable” issues lets you relax once the bump-and-grinding begins.  And isn’t that the point of all this in the first place?

So, although I hope those poll results are a little screwy on the actual numbers, I know there are people out there who fall into these no-talky categories and I feel the need to say…

For the Sake of Good, Naughty, Wild and Carefree Sex – Talk to your partner about the “icky” stuff first. Your mind-blowing orgasms will thank you in the end. 

**Speaking of Orgasms** – I think my friend hooked up with that web developer guy the other night. Bad Girl that she is. I know they left together after our dinner, but I haven’t had a chance to catch up with her since. Hope she had all these “talks” we’ve been discussing! Maybe she’s trying to get in on that new Sex Site he’s making. hah.**