Poll Results

Wow – did I just date myself with that song? Anyhoo…

News Flash!

• 11% of Americans don’t know you CAN get pregnant while having sex standing up
• 26% never discuss contraception with their partners
• 31% never discuss sexual health such as STIs with their partners

These figures were recently released based on a poll of 2,000 Americans between the ages of 16 and 50 according to this article.

No mention of who conducted the poll nor their methods was revealed, making the poll itself very very very suspect in my mind. (For all I know the author of the article pulled the numbers right out of his you-know-what.) But the validity of the survey isn’t really the interesting part…It’s the idea behind the questions that I’d like to focus on here.

No Sexy Talk with Your Sex Machine?

You’d think that if there was one person in this entire world who you could talk with about sex in an open and nonjudgmental way it would be your own lover. After all, you’re HAVING sex WITH them. At the very least, you’d probably want to talk about life-altering consequences such as…oh…Children and Incurable Diseases!

Breaking it down, I suppose you could avoid the STI conversation after you’ve been sleeping with just each other for a while, assuming no one is cheating, swinging, etc.

But what about in the beginning? Are you really going to have sex with someone without asking if they’ve been tested recently? (And if not, what makes them believe they are disease-free?)  It seems like an awfully big risk for 20 minutes of hot, heavy sticky fun.

But let’s assume you’re willing to take that chance JUST to avoid an emotionally embarrassing conversation…

Not even Contraception talk?! A basic – “Do you use condoms?” “Are you on the pill?” Really? What happens when you’ve both taken your clothes off and are ready to “connect”? Does he just assume she’s on birth control while she just prays she doesn’t get pregnant this time? Eeek!

How can either of you have ANY fun if all you’re doing is worrying about these things in the moment rather than taking care of the issues beforehand?

Even if you don’t care about your own personal safety or possible accidental procreation – at least care about the quality of your sex!

Talking about these “big, uncomfortable” issues lets you relax once the bump-and-grinding begins.  And isn’t that the point of all this in the first place?

So, although I hope those poll results are a little screwy on the actual numbers, I know there are people out there who fall into these no-talky categories and I feel the need to say…

For the Sake of Good, Naughty, Wild and Carefree Sex – Talk to your partner about the “icky” stuff first. Your mind-blowing orgasms will thank you in the end. 

**Speaking of Orgasms** – I think my friend hooked up with that web developer guy the other night. Bad Girl that she is. I know they left together after our dinner, but I haven’t had a chance to catch up with her since. Hope she had all these “talks” we’ve been discussing! Maybe she’s trying to get in on that new Sex Site he’s making. hah.**

This post is strippingly sponsored by: Peek-A-Boo Portable Dance Pole – Bring the sensuality of pole dancing into your own bedroom!
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Traditionally strip clubs have been the “dirty” local haunts of “sleazy” men who get a quick sexual fix by watching greased-up naked women gyrate their nether-regions against shiny, phallically-symbolic penis poles. From this perspective it’s no wonder why many women absolutely refuse to set foot in such an evil den of open misogyny.

However, in recent years many strip clubs have been diligently working toward cleaning up their abhorrent reputations by creating spaces that are sleek, classy, and sophisticated. Just like any other up scale late-night bar, these clubs cater to their client’s every need, and encourage couples to enjoy the club’s offerings together.

While this may not be every couple’s idea of a romantic evening out, for some open-minded and adventurous duos a few hours at a strip club can be a very erotic and very rewarding experience. Judging by the latest S.S. poll results, most of you lovely readers know exactly what I’m talking about.

So before I get into why going to the right kind of strip club can be a blast, here are the official poll numbers:

Would You Go to a Strip Club with Your Lover?

MEN – Yes – 52%, No – 10%

WOMEN – Yes – 34%, No – 4%

Total YES – 86%!

Total NO – 14%!

That’s right, 86% of you said you would happily take your lover to a strip club, and only 14% said no way! Those are some very impressive numbers. Again you S.S. readers prove to be a very sexually provocative bunch. Good for you!

Top 3 Reasons to Take Your Lover for Some Stripping Fun

1. It’ll Make You Both Pantingly Horny – Of course this only works if both people are into these kinds of things. But if you’re lucky enough to be partnered to someone who enjoys watching beautiful naked women (and men) sensually lure their minds into the darker places of adult playfulness, then sit back and revel in the show.

Personally I love to watch other women flaunt their individual style of sexual confidence. Most strippers pick their own music, outfits, and choreograph their own routines, and I really appreciate their creativity. I think women are amazingly sensual creatures – especially when they understand how powerful sexual attraction is and have figured out how to manipulate it well. No, I’m not a lesbian – but some women make me think twice due to their overall appeal.

Not only should the club experience make you both incredibly aroused, it should make you feel closer to each other having shared such a “naughty” night out. The heady combination of naked women, relaxing atmosphere, and a few drinks should lead you straight to a very intense night with your beloved once you get home.

**Caution** – If you do not have a partner with high self-esteem, or you are not very communicative with each other, this date might lead to a lot of problems. For example he/she might think,

“…you are using those girls to put fantasies in your man’s head while he’ll be making you love at night. Payback will be bitter someday when you wake up…” ~Anonymous~

Clearly this person believes that if she goes to a club with her lover and they have sex afterward, he won’t “really” be having sex with her, he’ll be fantasizing about sex with the strippers instead. Does Anonymous have a point? Yes and no. Sure, the strippers might have been the ones who initially turned him on, and he might be thinking about them while having sex with you…But then again, what exactly are you doing? Wasn’t it the strippers who turned YOU on too? Aren’t you just as likely to fantasize about those ultra-masculine “hunks” (or women for that matter) while you’re having sex with your man?

On the other hand, neither of you might be thinking of the strippers at all. It’s just as likely that you’ll both feel extremely close to each other because of how much fun you’ve had together that evening. Knowing that you’re both in a very secure and exciting relationship will probably be enough to rekindle a lot of sparks between you – and the ensuing sex won’t have anything to do with the impersonal, delectable bodies you’ve seen parading around all night.

Furthermore, many people (men and women!) in long term relationships fantasize about other people during sex with their partners anyway – especially in “boring and routine” relationships. If your partner is going to think of other people while having sex with you, then he/she doesn’t need a strip club to prompt their fantasies – they’re already there.

2. It’s a Safe Way to “Play” With Others Without the Potential Emotional Consequences of a Threesome – Maybe one of you really wants to invite someone else into your bed, and the other one doesn’t. What if you’re the one who doesn’t but feels badly for “holding your partner back.” Well, why not compromise on getting him/her a lap dance or two?

The partner who wants to try other people will get the opportunity to explore this idea to some extent without doing anything “wrong.” Maybe having a stranger’s crotch in their face will be enough to suffice their sexual curiosity. Maybe it’ll dissuade them from wanting a threesome all together. Or maybe it’ll whet your own appetite for others. Who knows? The important thing is to experience it and then talk about how you felt and where you would like to go from there. If your parter still wants a threesome and you are even more set against it, then the club experience was a meaningful one.

Or it could turn out to be an exciting new experience for you both that you’d like to do again – and that might have been the needed thing all along (not the threesome, just the “newness”).

3. You Might Just Learn Something About Yourself or Your Partner – So you think you’re Mrs. Self Confidence, eh? Or you think your little mousy sex partner would never give you a lap dance in public, huh? Well guess what, after this date, you may have some rethinking to do! Both surprisingly good, and possibly bad thinking…

One of the major “problems” couples face when strip-clubbing together is how they each internally react to physically seeing the strippers. Many women look at the perfectly proportioned naked bodies and immediately feel intimidated because they don’t “look as good.” They grow worried that their lover’s will begin comparing their flawed physique to the stripping Goddesses’. Obviously this is bad for everyone involved. If she feels self-conscious then every second of attention her lover pays to the strippers will be resented, and she’ll grow irrationally angry at him. The longer you stay, the more irate she will become.

An evening that was supposed to be pure erotic nonsensical fun is now an argument waiting to happen. Unfortunately, this kind of sudden self-esteem plummet can happen to even the most seemingly confident women. If it does, just go home. It’s very important to remember that this has nothing to do with the man, and everything to do with the woman’s relationship with herself.

However, there are lots of surprisingly positive reactions that could happen as well! Things you’d never dreamed of might actually turn you on, your partner might be a lot more daring than you ever imagined, you might both go home with some new ideas to incorporate into your own sex life, and you might just meet some interesting people along the way.

Just Go!

Don’t let your personal fears and insecurities stop you from having new sexual experiences with your partner! That’s the quickest way to completely kill the sexual thrill of a relationship. I’m not saying you have to go to a strip club per se – you might have very valid moral reasons against them, which is fine.

But if you’re not going because you’re “scared” or “embarrassed” then you should certainly give it a shot! Have the “less embarrassed” partner briefly check out a few clubs until they find a nice one that you’d both enjoy going to. Then pick a night and have yourselves a crazy-wild time – TOGETHER. Because that’s the real point!

Explore Your Sexuality as a Couple:

• Erotic Dancing for Your Lover – DVD Guide
• Stripped – Adult DVD for Couples
• Taboo – Forbidden Fantasies for All Couples
• Guide to Private Dancing – DVD by Nina Hartley
• The Better Sex Video Series – Explore Your Sexuality Together

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This post is cuddlingly sponsored by: 300 Inexpensive Creative Dates: The World’s Most Unique, Romantic, and Fun Dating Ideas for Couples!
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Aaahhh, that blissful moment is finally here…The urgency of mating is over. The hectic panting, moaning, and fluid gyrating of your peaking lusts have past, and you’re both basking in the healthful glow of each other’s perspiration and internal concoctions of endorphin-induced euphoria. You sigh happily and roll onto your side, ready to scoop your lover up into a tender embrace, wanting to wrap your adoration and appreciation for them into one incredibly long kiss…

But as you reach out to cuddle their warm supple body against yours, instead of connecting with the delicious soft flesh you’re expecting, your hand hits the hard, cold, empty mattress beside you. Startled, you blink away the romantic fog from your eyes just in time to see your half-way-dressed lover kick the bathroom door closed behind them.

The loudness of the door’s thud whips you right back to reality. Your sexual buzz quickly disappears, and you’re left frowning and feeling utterly disgruntled with your apparently unemotional sex partner when you should be at the peak of relational contentment. How obnoxious.

The only bright side to this scenario (at least I suppose it’s a bright side) is that at one point or another, everyone has experienced that exact moment. Stereotypically the person left angrily lying on the bed has been the woman, but either that stereotype has always been wrong, or it’s in the process of changing. According to S.S.’s most recent poll results both men and women believe cuddling after sex is a very necessary and very important part of respectful sexual etiquette.

Is After-Sex Cuddling Necessary? YES!

Out of a whopping 47 respondents, 29 men and 10 women agreed cuddling after intercourse was a must, while only 5 men and 4 women said it was not. So not only are you S.S. readers a spankingly-kinky bunch, but you’re also lovingly cute with your after sex cuddles! Aaaaawww!

Do These Results Surprise You?

I’ll admit, they surprised me. I was expecting more women to say yes and more men to say no. In fact, I was expecting more people in general to say no, regardless of their sex. However in this case, I was very happy to be wrong! It seems cuddling is something almost everyone enjoys, including men – despite the amount of media hype trying to say otherwise. (I was sort of hoping for a fight on this issue, but since everyone here takes the time to enjoy their warm-fuzzies, I guess a big group hug will have to do…)

What About Those Non-Cuddlers Out There?

Just because you don’t think cuddling is a necessity doesn’t mean you’re heartless or cruel. Trust me, I was one of those four women who voted No! To me, and probably to most of you other non-cuddlers, snuggling after sex is nice sometimes, but just not every time. I don’t really feel shunned when my lover gets up right away, and I don’t think twice about moving right along with my day once sex has come to an explosive conclusion for both of us.

However, I do understand that for many people jumping up and putting my clothes back on without even a parting kiss would seem a bit harsh in a “Got what I needed from you so I’m leaving now!” kind of way. Because of this it’s very important for those of you non-cuddlers out there to remember to give your lovers the cuddle time they need to feel fulfilled. This is particularly true when you have a new lover who doesn’t yet understand your lack of affection does not mean you’re rejecting them, or worse, don’t love them.

And For the Statistic Geeks Out There – (Everyone Else Just Skip This Crap):

I performed a quick Sum 2 Var Proportion Test using Excel to equalize the proportion of men and women voters to see if there really was a significant difference between the cuddle/no-cuddle answers for men verses women. Turns out even at the strictest significance level of .01 (99%) the null hypotheses failed to be rejected. It seems both men and women are just as likely to be cuddlers according to this, admittedly small, sample! (This was also backed up using a confidence interval test as well! (-0.209 < p < 0.887) Cool, huh?)

Thank You My Sexy-licious Readers!

As always, enormous Thank You’s to everyone who took the time to vote in this poll! I’d stay for the cuddle-fest that’s sure to ensue after such a gushy display of gratitude, but I voted “No!” remember? As for the rest of you, enjoy the love!

Fun Things to Compliment Your Romantic, Cuddly Side:

• Romantic Travel Kit – An Easy Way to Bring the Sensuality with You
• Rose Petals, Chocolate Massages, Scented Bubble Bath…What More Could a Girl Ask For?
• Perfect Love Letters – Helping You Say Exactly How You Feel
• Romantic Printables – Love Coupons, etc. Perfect for Those Impromptu Evenings!
• 101 Nights of Grrreat Romance

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This post is spankingly sponsored by:Pierre Silber – Sexy adult costumes at great prices!
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It’s finally Halloween, my favorite holiday! Why is it my favorite? Because it’s the one day of the entire culturally-stifling year when you get to see who people really are deep down inside their unsocialized-business-suit selves. You can be wild, uninhibited, wear a Batman-cape, and act like a complete lunatic and no one will think any less of you. (Go ahead, I dare you to try the Batman-cape next Easter and see how that turns out!)

So to celebrate this glorious occasion I’m going to match up last week’s spanking new poll results with the costumes that best fits the particular implement of preference. This should be especially fun for those of you who voted (big Dracula love bites to all you voters by the way!).

The very serious information below should give you fundamental psychological insights into the inner-mechanisms of your personality – all based upon what you like to be spanked with! (OK, maybe “fundamental insights” is going a bit far…)

Spanking Role Playing Fun a la Your Favorite Torture Device – In Order of Least to Most Popular

Librarian/Student Fantasy with a Book (2%)

Just picture it: She’s the sexy young librarian and you’re the newest undergrad at Hard-On U. You walk in, she’s bent over trying to find a book on the bottom shelf, her juicy curves barely covered by her short black skirt…You approach. Offer to help her find what she’s looking for. And before you know it you’re sitting on her desk with her perfectly proportioned behind wiggling across your lap begging to be spanked with that dusty old hardcover copy of De Sade’s Greatest Filth. (Apparently her mind was “in the gutter” even before you got a hold of her)..I can see the 2% of you book lover’s blissfully shivering now…

Queen/Servant Fantasy with a Hairbrush (7%)

It starts with Queen Bitchy-Bitch ordering you to make her nightly bath. As her servant you’re supposed to be very professional about touching her slippery-wet gleaming skin, but her constant demands and nakedness turn you on like nothing else. So on this not-so-very-special night you can’t take it anymore and decide to turn the power tables around. She tells you to brush her hair, to make it smooth, to make it shiny, to get all the knots out. One order after the next. By the time you grab the hard flat antique-style hairbrush, you’re excited beyond words. You feel the hairbrush’s heaviness in your hand, and without warning yank Queen Bitchy-Bitch over the side of her bed and begin to paddle away at her very sensitive-after-bath cheeks...I think you can finish the rest by yourself. I know at least 7% of you wicked readers can…

Chef/Waitress Fantasy with a Kitchen Spoon (7%)

You’re a good waitress, but not good enough for Mr. Picky Chef. He seems to catch your every singly tiny mistake, and chastises you for each one. Last night you dropped a fork coming in from the dining room, and he glowered at you from behind the chopping counter. Heat rushed to your cheeks, and you had to turn away because of your embarrassment – not from dropping the fork, but from the immediate arousal his one look caused! Despite your better judgment Mr. Picky Chef pushes all your “have sex with me now” buttons, so you start to do things on purpose to piss him off. Your “mistakes” get worse until he has no choice but to punish you for your insolence. He picks up the most convenient tool for the job – his trusty over-sized cooking spoon – and heads straight for you…Mmmm, 7% of you should be panting away by now…

Construction Worker/Passerby with a Wooden Paddle (10%)

You pass this stupid construction site every day on your walk to work, and every day the same construction jerk whistles and shouts out obnoxious sexual taunts at you. It’s been over a month, and his comments grow more perverse every day. Finally he hollers out something about “smakin’ that” and it gives you an idea. The next day when he begins his ritualistic cat-calls, you stop in your tracks and walk straight past him into one of the “under-construction” rooms inside. He follows you into the empty room stacked with building materials, ready to order you back outside. But when he walks in he finds you standing next to his workbench, a square piece of sawed-off sheet wood firmly in your hand, and a look of determination on your face that no one could misinterpret…How’s that for a little paddling scenario you 10% out there?

WINNER BY FAR!

Sexy Devil/Priest with His Bare Hand (48%!)

Someone has to rid your hot next door neighbor of the slutty little devil that’s possessed her, and you are just the priest to do it! This fantasy is my personal favorite and gets my “creative” juices flowing like crazy. Let’s start off with her half-clothed temptingly devilish self tied firmly to her bed – after all she is the All Mighty Evil One and must be restrained lest she hurt those around her with her seductive powers capable of sexing the life right out of anyone. Then he enters, Mr. Virtue himself, set on ridding her of the evil spirit and her over-active libido. (Sounds like a really bad porn movie so far, doesn’t it?) Except her powers are too strong! Rather than cleansing her soul, she convinces him to give in to his most depraved fantasies – fantasies that include tying her down even tighter, ripping the rest of her clothes off with his teeth, and using his hands to create dark red streaks along every inch of her flawlessly creamy skin…My God, is it suddenly really hot in here? Oh right, that’s just the feeling of Hell coming up to grab me for such a sacrilegious daydream – But hey, at least 48% of you are going down with me!

No Spanking for Me Thanks! (26%)

Yeah, 26% of you said you’d prefer not to be spanked at all. And that’s perfectly fine too! You can still use any of the above role playing fantasies and adapt them to your very own special kinks. The spankers won’t mind! (However, I may have worded the question poorly – because some of these voters may like to be the one doing the spanking – just not being the one getting spanked.)

Even so, that still means that at least 75% of you wicked S.S. readers enjoy spanking, or at least the idea of spanking! Wow, that’s a lot. You guys and gals really are the sexiest and most open-minded group of blog readers in the world. How lucky can I get?!

And although it’s too late to buy your Halloween costumes for this year, you could still take advantage of the huge sales happening right now to surprise your lover in a few weeks – or whenever. Why wait for a holiday to play out your favorite spanking fantasies?

Thanks again to all the voters, and have an Unbelievably Uninhibited, Fantasy-Filled, Sexually Spooky Halloween!!!

Things to Help You Have a Spankingly Good Time:

• Spanking Videos
• Halloween Porn
• Paddles & Floggers
• Spank Me! – Top Rated Fantasy Kit
• Spank! Vol. I – Audio Erotica
• Spank! Vol. II – Because the first one was so good!

If You Enjoyed This, Then Don‘t Miss:

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Aaaahh, Bedtime. The best part of your day. Half-naked in your comfortable PJs, cuddling between your crisp clean sheets, over-sized blankets, and fluffy white pillows. Finally a moment of pure relaxation in the stress storm that is your life.

And as your achy muscles slowly turn into blissful mush, you close your eyes and

We’ve all been there at some point…Well, most of us anyway. It’s late. You’re horny. And watching those little people on the screen bang away at each other just isn’t doing it for you. Nope, tonight you want…you need…the real thing.